“My eyes are here, ya know.”

Taeyeon looked at the brunette just to see the latter’s pouting. She smiled sheepishly as she swayed along to the music. She was supposed to be letting loose and yet, here she was, and mindlessly moving her body along to the beats without any adrenaline rush she supposed to feel.

They were all dancing together when Tiffany suddenly pulled her closer, holding her arm so close to her that she could feel the shape of her breast through her dress. Oh Shit

Taeyeon gulped, suddenly alarmed of her thoughts, shaking her head to push the thoughts away. She tried to slowly remove her hand from the brunette’s hold to no avail, which resulted in her looking at everywhere but her classmate.

“Are you still uncomfortable with me, Taeyeon?”

Taeyeon immediately turned to the sober voice of Tiffany who actually looked sober and somber at the same time. She could sense the hardened voice, hiding the sadness that the latter felt. She immediately shook her head to answer.

“No, I am comfortable with you! I won’t be even here dancing with you if I wasn’t.”

Tiffany’s mouth curving upwards at her answer also made Taeyeon smile. She chuckled and hugged the latter by her shoulder and swayed together to the music. Tiffany also held Taeyeon by the waist with one arm to keep them together in this funky crowd.

“Stay close to me!” Taeyeon heard the husky voice in her ear, too close that her ears reddened in the process. She heard Tiffany’s chuckle to her reaction despite the loud music, the excited voices of HyoYul from dancing and the occasional yells from the crowd.

She looked at Tiffany sideway and saw the girl smiling widely, her eyes showing her favorite crescents again. Ignoring her inner voice warning her to be careful, Taeyeon squeezed the girl’s shoulder and nodded.

“I will.”




“Now, that wasn’t so bad, was it?”

Taeyeon nodded and silently drank her lemonade. She decided not to drink anymore as she sensed her friends would be drinking their heart-out as they were having the time of their lives at the party. She should be the one who would be sober enough to make sure they all arrive their respective home safely.

“You should get out more, TaeTae.”

Taeyeon couldn’t still get used to the cheesy nickname that Tiffany called her occasionally. Ignoring the cringing feeling, she replied, “I still prefer to be a homebody, to be honest. I like peace and quiet over noise.”

Tiffany chuckled at her reason and crinkled her nose playfully, showing her dislike of being a homebody. Taeyeon then realized the latter was a walking seduction, knowing how to make one’s heart jumping out of their chest. Even her small little habits were so endearing, she knew Tiffany also knew that about herself, considering the dating record she had.

“I’m not saying to party only.” ,Tiffany smiled,” We can go shopping, watching movies and visit museums.”

Taeyeon felt her heart warm at Tiffany remembering her hobby. She remembered a pair of tickets that Sunny gave her a week ago. Excitement and nervousness ran through her veins as she contemplated to invite the latter.

“What’s the matter?” Tiffany leaned across the small bar table to observe her. They decided to stand around an empty bar table near the dance floor in case they could go back easily should they feel like dancing again,


“It’s definitely not nothing.” Tiffany pouted as she tiptoed a bit to leaned towards the latter across the table. Taeyeon flustered at the movement and scratched her head nervously.

“Tell me, Taeyeon-ah.”

Taeyeon swallowed and grabbed the edge of the table. Fuck it, she thought, it’s not even that important anyway. She calmed herself and willed herself to look at the earnest eyes of Tiffany who’s looking at her expectantly.


“Y-you see, I have th-“

Her words cut off short when she saw a hand suddenly hugged Tiffany’s waist from the back and pulled her backwards. Tiffany’s face froze for a second and Taeyeon went on full alert. She was going to shout at whoever the jerk was until Tiffany smiled suddenly and turned around to hug the culprit’s tightly.

The guy was lanky, thin with messy hair, wearing nerdy clothes.


That was what Taeyeon wished to describe the guy but reality was always a bitter pill to swallow.

The guy was a tall, handsome man with broad shoulders and a lightweight rugged beard styling his features more prominently in a good way. With an undercut hairstyle, the guy sure looked straight out of the magazine.

She would usually feel tingles and excitement seeing such a guy with greek-god beauty but she was feeling the opposite. And it made her angrier.

Choi Siwon

The hunk of the Drama Major, the hottest and the most desirable guy in the university, if Tiffany’s the It-Girl, he’s the It-Guy.


Tiffany’s excited voice broke Taeyeon from her thoughts. She looked at the duo embracing each other, exchanging talks. She could only focus on the hand that was squeezing the guy’s biceps and the guy’s hand that was holding the slender waist.

“I thought you were joking when you called me.”

 “And yet, you come.” Siwon replied playfully, poking Tiffany’s nose. Tiffany laughed heartily and swiped his hand away.

He then looked across the table, meeting Taeyeon’s eyes. He smiled at her and bowed his head as a greeting, which Taeyeon returned in response, her hands gripping her pants.

“Oppa, this is Taeyeon. She’s from my major.” Tiffany introduced her to the guy besides her, her hand still holding Siwon’s shoulder.

“Nice to meet you, Taeyeon. You are Yoona’s friend, correct?”

Exhaling softly, Taeyeon calmed herself down. Why was she in such a misery? Tiffany’s a friend, nothing more. She shouldn’t be feeling like this. She tried her best to give a sincere smile and shook the hand that Siwon extended.

“Yes, Sunbaenim. Annyeonghasaeyo.”

Siwon chuckled, as he retracted, “Please don’t be formal. I’m gonna graduate early next year anyway. Just call me Oppa.”

“Ya! She’s my friend! Stop flirting.” Tiffany warned Siwon as she slapped his chest. Siwon chuckled and leaned into the latter, “Jealous?”

Tiffany made a vomit sound and pushed his head away, “You wish.”


“Excuse me. I need to go to the restroom.” Taeyeon spoke as she grabbed her phone. She could no longer endure the suffocation she felt standing on this particular table. She faked a smile at the duo and turned around, heading straight to anywhere that would take her away from them.


Tiffany felt the hand stopping her from following the girl who just disappeared among the crowd. “Stay. She’s just going to the toilet.”

“But-“ She frowned, tugging Siwon’s hand. But the latter didn’t remove his hold.

“I’m your date tonight, Tiffany. You should be focusing on me.”

Tiffany snorted and removed her hand away from Siwon’s hold, “Who said you are my date?”

“Well, I said so. And besides, we just reunited. We have a lot to catch up!”

 Tiffany groaned, finally giving up,“Fine.”





“When are you going back?”

 Yoona looked up from her phone and saw Taeyeon standing, hands folded. Her demeanor seemed to be a bit different of earlier, seeing her face devoid of emotions.

“Maybe in an hour?”, Yoona answered, “I still need to wait for Yuri-unnie. She’s gonna send me back home.But it seems I’m gonna be driving tonight.”

 “I see. Have you been drinking?”

“Nope. I have a shooting tomorrow.”

 “Great, can you also send Sunny back home? She’s just a street away from Yuri’s.”

 “Sure?”, Yoona frowned, feeling confused. Taeyeon walked silently towards her to grab her stuff that Yoona was assigned to guard.

“Unnie, you okay?” Yoona asked, feeling worried at Taeyeon’s behavior. Taeyeon nodded and faked a smile although she knew it was obvious. Yoona was a very observant person and she knew the latter realized something was wrong with her.

“I’m fine. Don’t worry. Just tired from dancing.” Taeyeon replied promptly as she opened her phone to type.

“Where’s Fany Unnie?”

Yoona saw Taeyeon’s hand stopped typing midway at the question. She also gripped the phone tightly as she answered, “She’s talking with Siwon-Oppa over there.”


Taeyeon closed her phone after typing and looked at Yoona. “I’m gonna leave early if you can handle them? Will that be okay?”

“Sure. Don’t worry.”

Taeyeon patted her shoulder in gratitude and smiled sincerely.

“And Yoona.”


“Can you NOT tell my address if Tiffany asks you about my address? The same goes to Sunny and Yuri. Tell them I said that.”

Yoona decided not to probe further of Taeyeon’s strange request and nodded,“I see. Okay, You have my word.”

“Thank you, Yoong.” Taeyeon knew she could count on Yoona. The latter always kept her word.

“Are you sure you are fine, Unnie?”

Taeyeon nodded and answered with finality, “Never been better.”



Hey, something came up and I need to leave. Take care.

Tiffany swore out loud, seeing the text. She immediately unlocked her phone and pressed the numbers she knew by heart.

“The number you have diale-“

Damn it

She ended the call and redialed again, only to hear the same message. She finished her drink quickly and grabbed her purse.

“Wait, where’re you going?!”

Tiffany could hear Siwon’s voice but she didn’t care. She pushed her way through the crowd and walked towards the booth.



“Have you seen Taeyeon, Yoona?”

Yoona looked up and saw Tiffany folding her arms just like Taeyeon did when she was here. “Yeah, she said she’s tired and went home.”

“What?? I thought something came up!” Tiffany looked like she’s gonna blow up any moment.

“Did she text you?”

“Yeah.” Tiffany showed her phone to the younger one. “She has also turned her phone off.” She continued, irritated.

“Ya, Hwang Miyoung! What the fu-Oh!Yoona! Hi!”

Yoona waved back at Siwon, eyebrows raised. She looked back at Tiffany again who was furiously typing on her phone which she assumed the text must be for Taeyeon.

So this is what happened

She mentally thought as she smiled at her senior. “Hi, Oppa. When did you get back?”

“Just two days ago, Yoong.”

 “I see” Yoona responded as she turned to Tiffany, “I think Taeyeon-unnie’s just exhausted, Unnie. The partying is not her cup of tea after all.”

“She should have just come back and told me. I would have accompanied her home.” Tiffany huffed, sitting down.

“Hey, what about me?! I’m your date.”

“Pfft, you are a guy, and straight out of military. You can take care of yourself.”





Yoona just observed the interaction silently. She sighed heavily. Taeyeon had a lot to explanation to do.



Taeyeon avoided Tiffany like plague.

She knew that deep inside it was rude of her but what can she do? She couldn’t face her knowing these adulterated feelings she’s developing on the latter was getting hold of her. She came to this undeniable conclusion after three days of staying at her one-bedroom flat depending on the leftover food and ramen.

She switched off her phone during these days messaging all of her friends not to disturb her beforehand and made sure they got the clear message. It was the hardest three days she’s ever had in her life. She still struggled to come in terms with what she felt for Tiffany. She was very certain the brunette would be fuming mad by now considering Tiffany’s fiery attitude and go-get-it done personality.

Taeyeon sighed for the nth time, breathing heavily. Even the breathing is suffocating. She decided to make use of the time she had before going back to the University on Monday. Taking her drawing tools from the drawer, Taeyeon focused on sketching, hoping a certain eye-smiles would disappear from her mind for a good while.

“What are you doing?”

Taeyeon jumped in surprise hearing the voice next to her ear. She turned around and saw Yuri looking at her eyebrows raised, leaning to the wall. She scowled as she pretended to dust off her clothes.

“This isn’t your class, Yul. What are YOU doing here?”

 “I’m waiting for an answer from my stupid midget friend who bailed on us in the middle of the party and went off the radar for three days.”

“I was sick.”

 “I have been your friend for more than five years. You should come up with a better excuse than that.

Taeyeon glared at Yuri, starting to get annoyed, “Can’t I be sick?”

“Yoona told me what happened. It seemed you went home without telling Tiffany. She was worried, ya know?”

“I texted her.”

“Then you switched off the phone, texting us that you’re sick and you wanted to be alone the next day.”


“You took Sunny as your plus one, Taeng. You should have accompanied her throughout the night. It was not nice.” Yuri reprimanded her best friend thoroughly. Taeyeon would behave in this way from time to time when she couldn’t deal with a situation, or even to confront about it.

Taeyeon bit her lips, guilt consuming her. Sunny would be definitely mad by now. She may look laid back but she didn’t accept any rude behavior.“I’m sorry.”

Yuri sighed and patted her back, “You should be saying that to Sunny and Tiffany, buddy. You can’t act like this every time you have problems.”

“I know.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“About what?”

“Tiffany issue.”

“….Not now, Yuri.” Taeyeon responded flatly as she gently removed her best friend’s hand. “ I will personally apologize to Sunny after school.” 

“How about Tiffany?”

“I will, later.” Taeyeon winced a bit as she thought about the missed calls and voice messages that she received from Tiffany after opening the phone which lead her to switch off her phone throughout the day.

Yuri nodded, decided not to push her best friend further. She then looked inside the classroom and turned to the latter. “What were you looking at?”




“Okay then. I will be off now.”

Taeyeon nodded as she prepared to enter the class.

“Tiffany’s not at school by the way. So don’t worry.” Yuri snickered as she ran away quickly to avoid Taeyeon’s wrath.


“KWON YURI!!!!!”





Author: MotoFoko

A wanderer. Soul searching. Writing calms my mind.

4 thoughts on “노력STRUGGLE”

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